FREE: Abraxas

The listing, Abraxas has ended.

Jesse "The Body" Ventura, governor of Minnesota and defender of the universe. What else could you want from a bad movie? Well, first and foremost - cut out the soft jazz music soundtrack. Gads it was annoying, everything to soft music... ...a tender moment between Abraxas and Sonia: soft jazz. Abraxas and Secundus kicking the crap out of each other: soft jazz. Somebody sitting on the toilet, okay that didn't happen but if it had: soft jazz. Well, our favorite wrestler-turned-state leader is a sort of intergalactic cop, protecting everyone and thing from the bad guys. Secundus was his partner, now a serious bad guy, intent on discovering an equation which will grant him limitless power. To this end he impregnates Sonia, lucky for her Abraxas is no heartless killer, she raises the resulting child rather well. Except he doesn't talk, until the end of course. The bad guy escapes prison, intent on wringing the anti-life equation out of Tommy, so the good guy pursues (insert relevant names here) and a climatic battle is imminent! Imminent in the sequel, but imminent none the less. I must recommend this film with reservation, but you have to hear the governor of Minnesota say, "My box has VD."